Short term missions vs. Christian tourism

The majority of those I have daily contact with are the short term visitors to Tenwek. They include volunteers who serve with Tenwek Community Health and Development, through World Medical Mission, a ministry of Samaritan's Purse, or even medical students and residents looking to take an international elective. At any point in time there could be between 5-20 visiting staffers serving at Tenwek which makes it a very dynamic and exciting place to be.

There have been some incredible people come through here that have encouraged and loved me and several others who were just looking to serve their time here and be on their way. But despite their relationship to me, each of them greatly impact those they interact with - whether they know it or not.

Physicians have it easy. They are trained, brilliant professionals who can come and practice medicine to their upmost abilities in a circumstance that requires their specialty. They arrive one day and then next they are rounding on patients and ordering labs, just in a different country with different patients and most likely different symptoms than before. Don't get me wrong, it's a difficult place to work, but they have the skills and training to do it.

But us lay people, we have a challenge on our hands. The non-medically trained short term missionaries have to find a place to fit in and create purpose for themselves. There are several ways to get involved but it's truly up to said person to figure it out. And that gets difficult when we're talking about a whole team of people who aren't medically trained professionals trying to volunteer their time and energy in a placed focused on medical care.

All of this to say, I'm working through the concept of short term missions right now and I can't say that I've come to an accurate and concise opinion. This evening I had the pleasure of meeting a short term group of pastors that are here volunteering with TCHD to help organizing and facilitate the next children's rally that will be in Nakruru this coming weekend. They are passionate about missions, one being a missions pastor, but are more interested in how the American church can be involved with the global church in a beneficial and effective way.

One thing that this missions pastor said really struck me. He stated, "We're not in the business of Christian tourism."

It's a truth I think every short term mission agency, church group, school group and or summer trip should abide by. Missions is not a way to see the world - well it is, but it's a way to see the people of the world and learn about them and learn to love them just as Christ does. They asked several really challenging questions like, "What does it mean to this community to have short term teams come?" and "If there is a more efficient way to use our resources, whether that be sending money or teams or nothing, what would that way be?" These are questions that need to be asked of ourselves.

One of the greatest books about short term missionary service that I've read to date is written by Steve Corbett and Brian Fikkert entitled "When Helping Hurts." It's a very real perspective on what it means to serve the poor as affluent Americans/Westerners. One of their main conclusions reminds us that we are not going to serve to change everything and to fix a community; rather we are to unite with the people of a different community in order to empower them to ignite self motivated change that will improve their circumstances and lead them towards Christ. But how do you do that?

I think everyone's still trying to figure that one out. But a really great place to start is by asking a community or a group of people what they need, as a opposed to what we can do to improve their situation. People are people no matter where you go and they have the capacity to develop, to grow and to lead with dignity even though it might look much different than we hoped it would.

Culture is a huge barrier sometimes - well, most of the time - so spending time with the people you're serving, even joining long term missionaries or service volunteers, is crucial to the development of your ministry. One of our long term missionaries said, "If short termers come in with a heart willing and motivated to change more than they're hoping to create change, then they're in the right place." I agree.

Those sitting around the dinner table tonight ended the conversation saying that one way to improve and sustain short term ministries is to build them up so that they are recurring annually, or bi-annually, or as often as possible, in the same place and in the same ministry. You hear it all the time but truthfully, ministry is all about relationship; building those deep and lasting friendships takes time and investment and love.

I know this is a huge topic amongst the American church, but I want to take it to a global perspective. Seeing as the last thing that Jesus said before he left this world was "Go therefore and make disciples of all nations, baptizing them in the name of the Father and of the Son and of the Holy Spirit, teaching them to observe all that I have commanded you," I think it's safe to say that going to the nations is crucial to the Gospel (Matthew 28:19-20).

So what do you think? Are short term missions the answer to this Great Commission? If so, how would you, or are you, responding? And if not, why?


Prayer requests:
- Please pray that the Children's Rally this weekend, expectant of 5,000 children, will work powerfully in the lives of those involved.
- Please pray that holiday plans to return home for a few weeks in December will be scheduled soon.
- Please continue to pray for the short term and long term missionaries that serve the Tenwek community diligently and passionately.


|| God, give me the grace to accept with serenity the things that cannot be changed, courage to change the things which should be changed, and the wisdom to distinguish the one from the other. - Reinhold Niebuhr ||

Never Give Up, Never Surrender

What's the greatest film of this generation?

Some may say the Lord of the Rings Trilogy, or the Harry Potter series. Or what about "Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind" or even "Up." All would be wonderful examples of great movies based on their thematic overtones and visual effects.

But I'm not too sure if I would dub any of these the greatest film of the generation. There's only one movie that can hold this title and that movie is "Galaxy Quest."

Staring Tim Allen, Sigourney Weaver and Alan Rickman (who also plays Severus Snape in Harry Potter), this film is a brilliant combination of thrill, romance, humor, and of course an alien race in need of assistance. What else could you need?

The plot revolves around the main character Jason Nesmith, played by Tim Allen, who is an ex-actor of a sci-fi show called "Galaxy Quest." He, along with the rest of his crew from the fictional show, are asked by an alien race to help save them from destruction of a rivaling enemy race. You know, the usual plot turns occur in the midst of some struggle and laughs here and there, all the while the good guys win in the end.

You may be asking your self, "Is this girl absolutely off her rocker?" The answer is yes, but let me explain why.

One of the greatest lines in the movie occurs when the show's cast is in space trying to solve the problem of the broken beryllium sphere that gives power to the whole ship. Gwen, played by Sigourney Weaver, was hired to be the beauty in the show of all men and her job is to make sure that communication is up and running. So while they are deliberating about what to do about this power source, she's repeating everything the computer says despite everyone's ability to hear it and communicate back to it on their own. One of the crew members yells, "You know, that's really getting annoying!" And Gwen replied, "I have ONE job on this lousy ship. It's stupid, but I'm gonna do it, okay?"

I was on the volleyball team while at Wheaton and last year's season was a tough one for me. As a senior, I expected to play and to play well, to lead and to lead well, to do all of things that I had aspired to do throughout my years there. But that was not the case. I ended up on the bench the majority of the season. The players on the bench are responsible for keeping stats and that's exactly what I did - me and that clipboard became really close. So when someone would try and take it from me in a gesture of kindness, all I was thinking in my head was, "I have ONE job on this lousy team. It's stupid, but I'm gonna do it, okay?" Probably not the best response to a 10 year journey with volleyball, or with grace, but it was all that I had to hold on to at the moment and although I despised every minute of holding that stupid clipboard, it was the only role I could fill well. So I did it. And "Galaxy Quest" gave me a humorous way to look at it, which was exactly what I needed.

Another amazing line spoken by the Jason Nesmith, the Captain of the show, says this, "Never give up, never surrender." Jason's character is disliked among the majority of the other characters based on his selfishness and inability to take things seriously. So when he says this they all roll their eyes and grumble knowing that he's a fraud. But this changes when the leader of the alien race is being tortured but speaks these words in full assurance that they will help him survive.

A few weeks ago, a few of the girls from Tenwek wanted to take a trip to Naivasha and Nakuru to get away for a few days of rest and relaxation. Turns out rest and relaxation looks a lot like biking through a national park, Hell's Gate, with zebras, warthogs and giraffes running along side of the road with you. You might be saying, "Wow! Amazing!" But hold the phone, have you ever tried to bike on a dirt path for an hour and a half on a bike that was probably made 20 years ago with no gears and a seat that made your back side scream? I didn't think so.

About 15 minutes into the ride, I had another "Galaxy Quest" quotable moment. All I could think about was that these girls were doing the same thing and keeping it together, so all I kept saying to myself was, "Hannah, never give up, never surrender!" How lame am I? Pretty lame, but it worked. I had a few low moments of near tear experiences but I must say that it was absolutely worth it. Despite my bruised behind, it was unbelievably beautiful.

Okay, okay.. so I may be delusional when it comes to choosing high quality films, but you have to agree that the quotable lines from this movie are pretty applicable. And how often do we feel like that? Feeling like we have one job, it's hard, it's verging on ridiculous, but it's what we have to do. Or feeling like all we can do trust and believe that it'll be okay, never giving up and never surrendering to the challenging circumstances set before us.

I'm reading through Oswald Chambers' My Upmost for His Highest and from today's devotion is reads, "If you are going to be used by God, He will take you through a multitude of experiences that are not meant for you at all, they are meant to make you useful in His hands, and to enable you to understand what transpires in others souls that you will never be surprised at what you come across." This observation is based on 1 Peter 4:13, "But rejoice insofar as you share Christ's sufferings, that you may also rejoice and be glad when his glory is revealed."

Suffering can look different to everyone, and the enemy proves that to be true, but when we are sharing in the sufferings of Christ, in the will of God (v. 19), than rejoicing and doing good should be the fruits of that pain. The Father, Son and Holy Spirit infuse those who believe with outstanding grace and absolute forgiveness that when we suffer according to His will, we are experiencing God and being taught how to become more Christ-like. It's not easy, I don't think it's meant to be, because we are to trust and obey that what He puts in our path is to encourage us to soak deeper into His love.

I know the example of "Galaxy Quest" was a stretch, and surely you must know that I'm kidding about the greatest film of all time thing (sort of), but in these small and almost insignificant circumstances I was challenged to view them in light of 1 Peter 4.  On the volleyball team, I found hope in the girls. They encouraged and pushed me to be the best woman of God I could be, not the best volleyball player. And on this outing to Hell's Gate, the natural scenery was enough to make all of us stop in awe of the creation that He has made for us to admire and worship Him through. God is good, all the time.

Lastly, shout-out to my family. You guys might be only ones who think this post is funny in the slightest. Miss and love you.

|| Therefore let those who suffer according to God's will entrust their souls to a faithful Creator while doing good - 1 Peter 4:19 ||

This is Africa

Last week I had the privilege of joining the Tenwek Community Health and Development team for a day of adventure. This is an incredible ministry that serves the surrounding community by providing baby and mother vaccination clinics, in addition to many other services, every month and they provide this service to about 30 different sites around the county. This particular trip, they had warned us that it would be a busy day. Challenge accepted.

I joined two short termers who had wanted to get involved. One was a nurse, Michelle, so would be able to help administer the vaccinations. The other, Linda (like myself), was non-medical but was there for the journey. And that's exactly what we got.

We were told to show up at 9:15 am for departure but on our arrival, not even the driver had shown. Slowly but surely people began to trickle in but by that time they decided to take tea. Priorities. After tea, which is called chai (a water, milk, sugar, tea combo that they serve at scolding temperatures yet is quite delicious), we all piled into the bed of a pickup that had been refurbished to seat 10 rather uncomfortably. So we packed 10 into the back of this truck and we were off. By this time it was 10:30.

About an hour into our trip, I began to get a little leery of how far away this clinic was. I asked one of the nurses and she responded with a quick and smiley, "90 kilometers, it will take about 3 and a half hours." Oh.. okay. Farther than we thought it was going to be, but still doable. We kept reminding ourselves, "We're here to help, to do what we can. Don't complain." This conversation all happened on paved roads.

Then we hit the dirt. We then spent 2 hours driving on unpaved roads back to a small village and by the time we arrived, my tush was thrilled that my feet had to make an appearance once again. We walked into a doorless and windowless building, that I think was the church for the community based on the wooden benches that looked like they were arranged like pews, and saw close to 150 women sitting, waiting to get examined or for their babies to get their appropriate vaccinations.

I had been on a community health clinic visit before (pictured below), but this was by far the largest that I had seen. The amount of women and children that showed up at this clinic was absolutely astonishing. These women have to walk hours away from their homes to get themselves and their children treatment.

During the visit, I helped fill syringes with one vaccine or another while Michelle and several other community health nurses administered the vaccines. They worked with incredibly steady hands and even stronger will powers to continually inflict pain on these children. When the older children, or even mothers, need vaccinations, watching their faces was intriguing. You know when you go to get blood drawn, a vaccine, or a shot of any kind at the doctor? They prepare you, distract you, make you feel comfortable in a sterile office and then make conversation with you as they administer the shot attempting to make this unpleasant experience less unpleasant. And we still wince or complain that it "stung a little." These women walk up to the nurse, expose their shoulder, get poked by this needle, don't even flinch, and watch the whole thing. They are stoic while their pain tolerance is out of this world. I don't know if we're wimps (because, trust me, I've been known to pass out during shots), or they are just incredibly resistant to pain. But either way, these women are amazing.

The clinic lasted approximately 4 hours and at the end of the day, when the white folk were in the car ready to head out, the nursing team decided that it was time to take tea, yet again.  So by the time we left, it was almost getting dark and we had 3 and a half hours to drive to get home.

Man, I kept thinking, "If only they would have done that differently." or "Why didn't you tell us ____ before we left?" I was frustrated at how slow things were moving, how unorganized people seemed, how difficult it was to move a group of people from one place to another and I couldn't seem to put a smile on my face to even pretend everything was okay. Not this time. It wasn't. It felt as if our time had been wasted. But then I remembered my last blog post.

"I give thanks," I said. 1 Thessalonians was quoted and I kept remembering that if I'm to live out these verses, if I'm to live the Gospel message in my daily life, then why am I not doing that now? Gotta love how God uses certain circumstances to remind us of Himself.

Changing my mindset and attempting to enjoy the ride was my new goal. I kept trying to interpret the Swahili that was being spoken to attempt to join in on the laughing that was happening the back of that truck. I started to thank God for the littlest things, "God, thank you for my jacket, the rain that's dripping through the covering, the air." But isn't it in the small things that we find life? My jacket keeps me warm and protects me from illness. The rain brings life to the earth and in turn produces the air that keeps my lungs and heart working properly.

So we finally made it home past dark and past dinner time, but you know what, we made it home. TIA was an acronym that seemed to keep coming up in conversation in the days prior to this excursion and you know when you don't know something but you don't wanna ask so you just nod and smile? Well that's what I did whenever someone would say TIA. But you know what, I should have asked because TIA, or This is Africa, would have been a totally appropriate expression of my emotions. This is Africa. It's slower, softer speaking, and different than any other place in the world. But it's absolutely beautiful. I just had to stop and open my eyes and heart to see that.

A few months ago I came across this video and loved it. Didn't even think about the title, but now it seems rather appropriate. Hope you like it as much as I do.

THIS IS AFRICA from Benjamin Dowie on Vimeo.

Please continue to pray for those affected by the Westgate attack in Nairobi. We praise God that everyone here at Tenwek was safe, but join us in remembering those that lost their lives, were injured, and were affected by the attack. God is sovereign.


|| A Cry to the Heavens
An elegy by the Senior Class, Rift Valley Academy

Scattered shoes and broken glass
Strewn on sparkling marble floors,
Sounds of trickling fountains
Drowned out by thunderous gunfire
Exploding from men with dark intentions.
Lives lost in senseless slaughter
Leave the hallways of our hearts empty.

Our spirits are heavy,
Minds full of fear and doubt.
Finding peace in the valley of the shadow of death,
To the Lord we cry out
with every labored breath –
For meaning, answers, forgiveness, hope,
Healing, and REDEMPTION –
Come before tomorrow
for we need light in the darkness,
a darkness wrought with sorrow.

We cry out to the Heavens for
An answer to the madness.

Restore to us the gift of peace,
The promise of life free of fear.
The days go on and on
Healing cannot happen fast,
But through love and strength and unity
The cowardice of evil men will not stand.
We can hope for another day,
A sky filled with joy and not with blackness
And the laughter of children
Will restore our halls to gladness.

It is with love and unity that we pray for all of you who are grieving and shaken by this horrendous act. We stand together with you. You are not forgotten. RVA Class of 2014 ||


Disclaimer: None of the ideas, views or stories expressed in this blog represent those of Friends of Tenwek, World Gospel Mission, or Tenwek Hospital. They are strictly the ideas and views of the author. Thank you! 

So, what is it that you do here?

Sorry for the long delay in keeping you all updated. A lot has happened in the last few weeks, including a safari (pictures below). But there's one simple question that I keep getting asked over and over again, "So, what is it that you do here?" Whether it's visiting physicians, or Maasai warriors in the Mara, I have gotten that question more than any other. Actually, maybe not more than, "What's your name?" But you get the picture. So I want to clear the air here and make sure everyone, including myself, is on the same page.

First, I work. My official job title is "Friends of Tenwek Intern," even though I'm not a part of an internship program or shadowing anyone in particular. This position was created and designed by my brilliant predecessor. He wasn't in the position, because it wasn't invented yet, but he was serving at Tenwek for a year helping with administration and ended up picking up some slack that hadn't been picked up in a while. After seeing the benefits of the role he was playing, Friends of Tenwek (FOT), the non-profit affiliate of Tenwek Hospital, decided to create and hire an "intern" to take over after his year was over. And here I am. My job consists of welcoming and hosting visiting staff (a skill that has yet to be harnessed most effectively), to help accumulate information about what's happening at Tenwek to be used on social media avenues, to pursue grant proposal opportunities that will benefit Tenwek and its community, and basically to be available for whatever anyone needs. Everyday is different. Everyday brings a new challenge, a new opportunity to dive deeper into the capacity of what this job holds. I'm a guinea pig in this scenario, and honestly - I'm loving it. It gives me the chance to be assertive, which I'm working on, to take initiative, that will come with time, and to develop skills that I don't quite have yet. They took a chance in hiring me, and now I have the chance to exceed expectations. Lord willing.

Second, I laugh. Mostly at myself for doing something dumb or making a mistake. But sometimes the best medicine is a little laughter. I have been able to spend a little bit of time up in the hospital watching operations, shadowing medical staff (which went in a totally different direction than I thought it would), and even just walking through the wards with a chaplain. You can't walk through this place without a sense of pain seeping into your soul. These people are hurting, they're sick. And the doctors are trying their hardest to treat with every available resource. Sometimes it's just not enough. But the one thing that I see more of in this hospital is people smiling at me. This place has pure joy that can't be burdened by the sin of looming death. Joy that shines bright as a light in the darkness, that can't be hidden under a bushel - NO. This place is the little light of the community and what a beautiful sight it is. The only thing we can do is laugh and know that the God who designed it all has His hand in everything. Laughter breaks cultural, lingual, social, and religious boundaries. And when you can laugh with someone you can open the door to some amazing opportunities that only God alone could have orchestrated.

Third, I give thanks. Even when I feel like I have nothing to be thankful for. It's easy to get caught in a spiral of self pity when you're alone, speaking from experience. But despite my doubt, I remember that I'm not alone. I'm never alone. And that could either be slightly creepy, or absolutely reassuring. I'm going to choose door number 2. "Where the Spirit of the Lord is, there is freedom." - Hillsong. Where the Spirit of the Lord is (which is everywhere, all the time, with us, surrounding us, and pursuing us each personally and wholly), there is freedom. There is freedom to fail, to feel weak, to love, to rest, to work, to complain, to worship and to give back the thanks that He sovereignly deserves. A few years ago, my sister gifted me one of the Starbucks mugs that has the leaflet insight that can be decorated with pictures, quote, inside jokes and whatnot. Madi had chosen a nice leafy template, selected assorted pictures of us from the years, and put a Bible verse on the top. When she gave me the mug she told me the verse was "random but good." Exact quote. It states in 1 Thessalonians 5:16-18, "Rejoice always, pray without ceasing, give thanks in all circumstances; for this is the will of God in Christ Jesus for you." I got to thinking how concerned I've been about what God's will is for my life? Aren't we all? Aren't we always weighing choices and making sure that we have God's final "Yes" on a decision before it's made? I want to encourage you, that although we deliberate on these big questions trying to figure out what God's will is, the answer is written in this "random but good" verse in 1 Thessalonians. The will of God in Christ Jesus for all of our lives is to rejoice always, pray without ceasing and give thanks in all circumstances. It's absolutely not the answer I wanted to hear (I prefer a letter ending up in my mailbox telling me that I'm accepted into Hogwarts without even applying), but it's the answer that's ours to have, if we choose it. 

I hope this was helpful. Even if it wasn't, it gives me the chance to process. So thank you for giving me that opportunity, and reading it all the way through.

Please pray that I find time to worship and love deeply. Also, please pray that this community would continue to be encouraged by God's overwhelming presence!

Supercalifragilisticexpialidocious

Happy Sunday.

This past week I was asked to house sit for the Chupp's, which includes watching their precious pup, Bailey. Throughout the week, in addition to my duties as the FOT intern, I was able to sit on a real couch, host some short-terms for a game night, and watch several movies from an impressive collection. If you know me at all you know that I absolutely adore watching movies. They bring you into a different world and show you how characters develop, or not, throughout the course of several hours. Plus they give you an unlimited amount of quotes to add to your vocabulary.

One evening, I was feeling sentimental and decided to watch something I hadn't in a while: Mary Poppins. The only thing I really remembered from the movie was the dance sequence with the penguins so re-watching it was actually great because I felt like I was watching something I hadn't seen before. Despite Mary Poppins' magical carpet bag, umbrella floating and being able to jump into chalk drawings, the movie includes some impressive themes such as positivity, familial struggle, creativity, and seasons of life. Seems pretty realistic for a fictional story, does it? My favorite character in the movie is Bert, a jack of all trades and Mary Poppins' closest normal friend. He's kind and charismatic while having the compassion to see a need and fill it. Right before the acclaimed "Step in Time" number where all the chimney sweepers dance on the roof tops, Bert and Michael (the little boy) look up into the chimney. While all Michael sees is a dark and dirty chimney, Bert sees something extraordinary. He sees, "A doorway to a place of enchantment."

Bert seems like the kind of person I would want to hang around. The kind of person that sees a desolate and empty opportunity and makes it into an adventure. The kind of person that sees something spectacular in people.

How amazing, and how.. Biblical. God created us, we sinned, He sent His Son, He died for us sinners. Why? Why did He do that when He knew we were dark and easily tempted by the world's distractions? Because He saw something beautiful in His creation, and still does. He has created a doorway to a place of enchantment for us in order enjoy His perfect love forever. Sounds like the place we ought to want to be.

Tom and Anne did such a beautiful job presenting the Gospel to these children!

I also had the chance to visit Kitoben Children's Home this week with a short-termer that has been here several times and has invested years in getting this home on its feet. The first day Anne took me and a visiting adoption counselor, Whitney, and we each got the chance to share a few words with the children. Anne spoke about the story of the gospel, Whitney preached about Christ's love for each and every one of those children, and I gave a short blurb about the gift of learning and our opportunity to search for Christ through school. Anne and Tom, her husband, have made a flip card bible verse key chain with 4 bible verses on it that these children, about 50, are memorizing. They have also begun to teach them the importance of discipleship groups and just yesterday implemented several groups lead by the older children in the home. They have incredible dreams for this community. I can't wait to see how they are used. You can learn more about it here: http://kitoben2013.blogspot.com/.
And this is just one of the families. Imagine being in a place where everyone wants to help, wants to improve their surrounds in some way, especially if they are willing to go before the Lord and advocate in prayer.

Visiting audiologist, Audrey, loving the tea factory tour.

In the midsts of the greenhouses where the roses were grown at Finlay's. 

Yesterday, a group of short-termers visited Finlay Tea Factory in Kericho, Kenya. This 5,000 hectare property that produces hundreds of thousands of pounds of tea daily. We got a tour of the tea factory which included a tea tasting session after the walking through the production and packaging rooms. We also were able to see a flower factory. This flower production plant grows roses primarily, but has several new flowers they are beginning to grow and export. Fun fact: this particular flower factory grew and exported 78,000,000 roses for Mother's Day this past year. Yes, 78 million. Unbelievable. And less than 1% of that goes to the US. Crazy.

Your prayers and thoughts have been powerfully working in my life and the lives of so many others, and I thank you from the bottom of my heart for your commitment to pray for me. Please pray that the short term visiting staff that comes and visits travels to and from their specific country or state safely, that their visit be blessed by each interaction they have and that the Lord's will be done despite our worldly plans.

If you guys have suggestions as to what you'd want to hear about please let me know! Remember, I'm new at this blogging thing and I'd love to keep you guys as informed and involved as possible because I wouldn't be here without you all.

One last thing. We played Apples to Apples again.. I didn't loose this time. Redemption!

|| Supercalifragilisticexpialidocious ||

Making New Memories

Over the last few days, memories from past experiences have been a frequent occurrence. I heard a song that reminded me of a late night McDonald's run including an impromptu dance party in the parking lot. I held my camera for hours this past weekend at a children's rally which made me think of those terribly long days during Wheaton in the Holy Lands where all we'd do was move from one incredibly historic place in Israel to the next attempting to capture the significance but taking selfies instead. I saw She's the Man for the thousandth time, quoting it all the way through of course, and laughed at every joke just like I had the first time I watched it with friends in high school.

In my Behavioral Neuroscience class, we discussed the significance of memory and in particular sensory memory - an individuals capacity to retain the impressions of sensory information after the original sensory stimulus has ceased. It seems really basic, and such a natural part of our lives but honestly, this function of the human brain fascinates me. We are constantly taking in information from our environment through our sensory experiences but the fact that our brain chunks particular information to particular stimuli is amazing. When I was growing up, I always had a difficult time remembering information for tests - learning to read was even a challenge because I couldn't remember the sounds of the letters and therefore couldn't construct the word. When I figured out that if I attach a stimulus to a word - for example, if I could touch my dog, read the word dog, and say it out loud - I could remember the information with much less frustration.

These sensory experiences have conditioned me to react to certain stimuli, stay calm in the presence of others and avoid some all together. Currently, I'm sitting in my apartment enjoying a cup of tea, listening to the rain pour on my roof thinking about how many times I've heard the question, "Doesn't it rain a lot in Seattle?"

This stimulus, rain, has conditioned me to think of my home in good ol' Puyallup, WA. I think of the football games where we have to stand in the rain without an umbrella because who uses umbrellas in Washington? No one. Rain is calming, and refreshing. It brings all of those smells alive that have been suppressed by drought. But you know what? I'm now living in a place where it rains almost every day too. And I was thinking that although right now, rain (and so many other things) reminds me of home, I think some day it will remind me of this place. This place where I'm still the new girl and I'm trying to figure everything out. This place where all of my stuff is but doesn't feel quite right yet. I'm hopeful, and trusting, that slowly but surely this place will become home for me.

But in all honesty, I'm having a blast! I'm learning so much. I'm attempting to master some very basic medical abbreviations (thanks Mom and Dad) to try and interact with the physicians I'm interacting with on a continual basis. I had the opportunity to attend a Children's Rally in Kericho this past weekend where 6500 Kenyan children gathered to hear the promise of the Gospel (pictured left). And tomorrow, I'm shadowing a respiratory therapist. My life is different every day which forces me to believe that the Lord washes me afresh for His purposes each new day.

Thank you all for your continued prayer and thoughts. Believe me when I say that I feel them, deeply!

|| And we urge you, brothers, admonish the idle, encourage the fainthearted, help the weak, be patient with them all. See that no one repays anyone evil for evil, but always seek to do good to one another and to everyone. Rejoice always, pray without ceasing, give thanks in all circumstances; for this is the will of God in Christ Jesus for you. - 1 Thessalonians 5:14-18 ||

Passing the time

Today marks the one week point that I've been in Kenya. Can't believe how quickly the time's already flying by. Everyday I learn something and meet someone new, continually make mistakes, and have already felt relationships develop in the short time that I've been a part of this community. It's not all fun and games, but sometimes it is! 

On Saturday we took a hike up to Motigo, with some cows. 

 

The view from the of Motigo. There were about 40 visiting staff and MK's who did the hike together. Definitely a hike for the record books. I also learned how to drive a motorcycle (not pictured, unfortunately).

There's a ministry here at Tenwek called Community Health dedicated to the surrounding community to encourage spiritual and physical health. I got the opportunity to visit Chepirir with a visiting family today. We told them the story of David and Goliath, played Simba-Simba-Zebra (Duck-Duck-Goose), played with bubbles and some good ol' fashion football. It was amazing. 

Two beautiful young ladies - Faith and one of her great friends. 

|| As we learn from David as he defeated Goliath -- never hesitate to take on big challenges, God will provide the stones || 

Apples to Apples

I made it!

I arrived in Nairobi very late on Sunday evening, spent Monday shopping with my host family (who would have thought my first day in Africa would consist of shopping?), and Tuesday was our travel day out to Tenwek Hospital. I was greeted by the cook in addition to some of the visiting staff and moved into my appartment located at the Guesthouse. This apartment complex is where I'll be living, eating, communing and serving for the majority of my time here and it's been a pleasure to begin to meet the people that I will be working along side of for the year. Gladys, the Guesthouse manager, is incredible. She's been kind in ways that I didn't think I needed kindness including giving me a tour of the hospital, introducing me to longterm missionaries, and just making sure I'm alive and well. My host family, the Chupp's, are long term missionaries here and Dr. Chupp is the leading physician and medical director of the hosptial. I'm amazed at how much he does and how he keeps a smile on his face and still makes time for his family. A challenging yet fulfilling lifestyle, from what I understand.

Last night I had dinner with some of the visiting staff, one of whom graduated from Wheaton in 1961(?). He and his wife met in Chemistry class and the rest is history. I told him it was a classic Wheaton love story and he laughed a little bit completely understanding the truth to that statement. I also met a couple and their daughters from Rochester, Minnesota who in fact work with a family whose children attend Wheaton. This is a small world and continues to get smaller at every turn.

After dinner the kids, including myself because I'm not quite sure if I'm allowed to sit at the big kids table or if I should dismiss myself with the kids, decided to play some games. They finished up a short card game and then decided to play Apple to Apples. Everytime someone says Apples to Apples someone else cheers and raves about how good they are at that game and how much fun it is.. that someone else is never me. Apples to Apples actually gives me anxiety and I cry myself to sleep after every time I play. In this particular game, the card that I put to down to be reviewed was in fact the first card to be reflipped over because it wasn't up to par with the choosers definition of "creepy" or "colorful." Playing with 6 young(er) kids who have no idea who Cher is apparently didn't appreciate my card choice as much as I did. Low and behold, by the end of the game I had accumulated 1 adjective card while each other player had at least 5. Let's just say, I'm a sore loser. Very sore.

This stupid game, rather my stupid response to a fun party game, pointed out some pretty harsh realities about my own will and personality. I like to be good at things, to get better, and to win. I blame this competitive drive on years of sports and it really is a part of who I am. But right now, when my job is to serve and to be served, to care and to encourage, this competitive drive might need to supside in order to let grace overwhelm me and others. This struggle reminds me of John 3:30 where it states, "He must increase, but I must decrease." How often do we want this but never fully empty ourselves so that the Lord may overflow?

Everyday will be a new challenge and a new opporunity to become a part of this community. I cannot tell you how blessed I have felt by your encouragement, emails, support, and love thus far. I'm hoping to take and add some pictures soon, I'm sorry they haven't come yet -- internet's a bit slow. Please keep me in your prayers for continued boldness in the Spirit and transition into a new life. God is good, and I pray I am steadfast in seeking His goodness around me!

|| I must decrease so that the heart of the Lord may overflow through me ||

The first stop

As a recent Wheaton College graduate, I thought it necessary to start this first post with a C.S. Lewis quote.

“To love at all is to be vulnerable. Love anything, and your heart will certainly be wrung and possibly be broken. If you want to make sure of keeping it intact, you must give your heart to no one, not even to an animal. Wrap it carefully round with hobbies and little luxuries; avoid all entanglements; lock it up safe in the casket or coffin of your selfishness. But in that casket - safe, dark, motionless, airless - it will change. It will not be broken; it will become unbreakable, impenetrable, irredeemable. To love is to be vulnerable.” - The Four Loves 

I was read this quote on numerous occasions within the last few months by friends who apparently recognized my tendencies to hide behind a facade of self preservation. Even in the midst of difficult circumstances, I would, and still do, put on a happy face and reassure those around me that "It's fine. It'll be good." And up until recently everything was fine, and it was good.

This short passage, or rather this massive slap in the face, took my head in its hands and forced me to stare my insecurities of feeling inferior and broken between the eyes. It's like I'm standing behind a hotel room door looking out through the peep hole seeing my life through a centimeter sized viewing platform. While others are looking through the same peep hole from the other side seeing absolutely nothing. It's not fair to me, or more importantly to others, that any information that I let slip or let in is minimal. I can't love or be loved living a life protecting myself from being broken. Unfortunately, I function quite well in comfortability and tend to seek stability rather than chaos or change.. but with this static nature, I have become hard hearted and probably act 20 years older than any normal 21 year old should. This in between time transitioning out of college and into real life has been challenging to say the least and it truly has hardened me to things of joy and beauty. Luckily, I have friends and family who do act their age and have provided me with a map to find the softness - the peace, joy, laughter, and grace - that I seem to have lost.

This map -- vulnerability. My first stop -- Kenya.

Tomorrow I leave for a year long adventure in Kenya serving at Tenwek Hospital. 3 flights, and 28 hours later, I should arrive in Nairobi to meet my host family! This step towards something completely new and absolutely out of my comfort zone will hopefully lead me to a place of complete surrender in the goodness of our King. I'll attempt to keep you all as updated as possible, but please forgive me if my blogging isn't up to par to the professional bloggers now-a-days.

|| I pray that the coffin of my selfishness will be shattered by the love that I feel and give, the distance between comfort and challenges, and that the very small peep hole that I experience life through now will be transformed into a window of vulnerability. ||